Fitting for the love of flattery

Acne, stretch marks, hair loss, oddly shaped body, chubbiness and so much more. That’s what I am. That’s what I am made of.

I won’t lie and say that it doesn’t matter to me what people say, or I am perfectly fine like I am. Because I am not. When dresses that I want to wear do not fit me, I am not okay. I am not okay when people stare at my acne or stretch marks. I am not okay when my pictures do not turn out the certain way, I want them to be.

We see on social media the plus size models; the body embracing movements and so much more. It’s difficult though. It is easy to see it all, and think we are the same way. But it is extremely hard to not get conscious in front of people. It’s hard to dress up and being laughed at. It’s hard to see others, and being a little different.

There’s a difference between acceptance, embracing, and flaunting. I have accepted my body as it is, though I work on it in order to stay healthy and fit, and of course to fit into certain clothes that I love. I have also embraced it up to some extent. However, flaunt is something that I am still unable to do. I am working on it though. Just like acceptance took some time, the others will too.

I still get awkward when being pointed at. I still get silent when laughed at. But that has not stopped me. I wear what I love to. I eat what I like to. And I ignore people when I want to. Was it easy? No. Will I stop being myself? Hell, no. Will I continue to wear what I like without thinking what I look like? YES.

What’s important is to not let it all affect your health, mental or physical. Working on yourself, for yourself, is the best thing that we can do. Ignore those who do not let you grow. It will take some time. The confidence, the glow, the happiness, it will all come, as you continue trying to be yourself more and more, and stop thinking about what others are thinking. Let the haters hate, and the proponent praise.

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